Families are a mixed blessing. In them we form our basic identity, patterns of operation and relationships that will go with us throughout our lifetimes. Positive behaviors and self-limiting self-talk take shape among family. We share more than just genetics we share experiences--both good and not so much. In this sharing we find common strengths and weaknesses.
The basis for family is marriage. Each marriage builds a new one from the remnants of two previous ones. The relationship and relatings of Mom and Dad inform the relationships and relatings of the children in the family. The stability of the family comes from a strong marriage partnership.
Yesterday, Lisa's Grandma McCoy was laid to rest.
I've thought much over the last few days about Laco and Edna. I also thought of Lovell and Allie and Os and Louise. These relationship were not perfect but they were permanent. The bedrock of whole tribes of children, grandchildren and great-great grandchildren. These folks and their salt-n-pepper partnership could be counted on. There used to be something unchanging in the rapidly changing world.
I want so very much for my children to have memories of their Mom-maw and Pop-pops, their house, their love, their example and their always being there. My own parents cannot provide this stability. My childhood family now has dual addresses and lifestyles.
I am Appalachian. We are a people bound to our land and to our clan. I pray daily that my children's children can find such a blessed heritage as Lisa and I have known in our grandparents. Amen.